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Darling (EP)

by Venator

supported by
Mr. Conner
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Mr. Conner Woke up before sunrise to play this all the way through. It’s something else. Spacious. Intimate. Genuine. Classic. Heartbreaking. Contemplative. Beautiful.
FLESH MECHANIC
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FLESH MECHANIC Definitely the most personal release of this project to date. More emphasis is put towards vocals and lyrics, but music doesn't take a backseat, rather serving more as a means of delivering the story here. The themes of this EP bring me back to my own younger days of being overwhelmed by limerence, confusion and conflicting emotions, but it looks back at those days with mature sobered up perspective, coming to terms with the past and one's own feelings and taking a step towards uncertain future. Favorite track: Deeper (feat. Paris DeShawn).
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1.
I remember every corner of your room All the sixth-gen games and all your plants too It's a shame we never hung out Only pictures of the coziest place Oceania ever knew I knew this was the prettiest girl I've ever seen With hair catching sunlight and eyes so green The only brightness in the dark of winter '18 And since then, in my mind, the most tender caffeine Aisha, come back into my life Aisha, you aesthetic angel Aisha Bare your soul to me, my love, just let it shine It's just as beautiful as your teeth You say that you don't like them but I see them all the time And I know all the love that you keep beneath This lobby full of faces, they could care less About the butterflies I have for you Then you went behind me, pressed up your lips to my ear, and you said ******** Then I woke up
2.
It must've been some summer madness gnawing down Fever of the heat deep in my mind I thought that it was love at first sight So many things I'd give up now For those first few months back Imbuing each other's lives 'Fore I was treated like a fool for the first time So many nights I try to think of where Where exactly you and I went wrong But now I know for sure A feeling's all we want 'Cause I never met you And I never will So what is all of this sweet talk for? But I've always loved you And I always will But find someone else who loves you more I know you'll be behind me when I'm ready to love again Judging them all from my side As you have since our love had died Can't you take it in yourself to keep me from my pain? Like you could at the start No, it was just a fling but just for heart Ever notice when we settled in Awkward silence starts to fill the air? Weeks go by without a word Until my soul hurts 'Cause I never met you And I never will So what is all of this sweet talk for? But I'll always love you More than almost anyone else But find someone else who loves you more I'd take ten million years of endless pain For one more "I love you" that I could read But in my health is where I leave you for my life 'Cause I know deep inside you feel the same Ask for your friends to love you And do you no wrong 'Cause your holier than thou bullshit Won't make you holy at all You made me a promise Then left me in the dark Just let me hold on to the one I thought I loved In our final hours Threw a blow so cheap You found someone else Now find somewhere else to sleep
3.
Waiting for you to Push me out like you always do I'm leaving without you again You don't even care Oh you say that you love me but it all feels so wrong Maybe I should give up and move on Seems you've already moved on Watching, waiting For things to change But deep down, I know The love is gone You've already moved on Seems you've already moved on Oh you say that you love me but it all feels so wrong Maybe I should give up and move on Your apathy gets the best of me Every night before I go to sleep I wonder if you'd even notice If you never saw me again I know I should forget you but it all feels so hard I don't wanna live alone anymore, but you're already gone I know you've already moved on
4.
In the night Hold you close I can't tell if This is real When you wake I ask you Is this love or Is this lust? I hold you close Is this love lost? Can you tell me What I'm feeling I'm stuck helpless Is this the love or lust? It's like an animal I think it's ******** But I know I love the feeling of lustful love In the night Hold you close I can't tell if This is real When you wake I ask you Is this love or Is this lust? Everlasting My emotions Think I'm moving In slow motion Dreaming, chasing after you Never nothing I can't do Better better better better I can't stop from feeling better Never never never never I won't leave you, no not ever In the night Hold you close I can't tell if This is real When you wake I ask you Is this love or Is this lust? I hold you close Is this love lost? I hold you close
5.
She love the passion but hate that madness it come with Been asking to let me go, but it's hard 'cause I keep her coming If it goes down between us it's 'cause I was up to something What's dark will come to the light, but it's dim and hard to put trust in I should do better, that's issues I gotta work thru, I hurt you 'cause I'm selfish, through silence just know I heard you I say I know a lot but it's still so much I can learn too If I'm to love you correctly it's needed for me to to learn you But who am I to turn to, no models to learn what love is The weight of my decisions gave new meanings to my crushes Best communication when we making love or we puffing If this is a forgone conclusion, I'm hesitating on jumping We fucking 'til the sunrise, arguing under moonlight Kiss of death to our egos, an Angel born gave us new life It's hard for me to sleep with these tears in my eyes like blue lights Heavy is the dark, but with Son above us it's too light Falling deeper in this pit of love We hit the bottom it might finish us These walls we built they just may limit us Sometimes I wonder if we did enough Falling deeper in this pit of love We hit the bottom it might finish us These walls we built they just may limit us Sometimes I wonder if we did enough This booth is my confessional Reckless the shit I'd get into Recollections of better moods Wish I had been a better dude Did what I said I'd never do Pain or peace, you had let me choose Wrong decisions that lead me too Planting seeds that had never grew Trauma broke me, I never knew How to fix me, whenever you Scream my name it's incredible Now my eyes looking dead to you Love or hate me, you've said it to Look ahead till it's severed too Deepest waters I delve into Die inside of the wettest tomb I done felt the boom from a love bomb Cold heart, passion doesn't burn if the love's gone Pen and pad, write about love but this ain't a love song Couldn't get it right, was left with nothing, I loved wrong Love's strong, but I know you needed more from me You tried to stick it out but my actions felt more like torturing Said you'd see see the change but the same mistakes kept distorting me You trusted me to lead but I often misused authority But surely we can fix it, get closer despite the distance To toxic for us now, but with time this shit might be different Done listening to demons, the words I speak for the living You'll never know the half of my problems to see the vision wave Falling deeper in this pit of love We hit the bottom it might finish us These walls we built they just may limit us Sometimes I wonder if we did enough
6.
Summer '17 was brutal Aromantic, dry and frugal Then you came into my life when love had gone away High adventures and sweet nothings And one embrace for our illusion Another Thursday night with you But now you got to go, got things to do That's fine, I got stuff to be at too I promise I won't stay lying here thinking about you You're everything I seek, let's go again next week But, you are just a friend Another one who needed something warm And what we have is perfect, please don't let it end so soon But I like to imagine if there was more Take me out for a ride, your eyes deceive me Take me to the other side, oh please don't leave me We'll do it under the night sky, make it forever It'll be just you and I, between our tether When I saw you that night, I thought I could get home so much sooner Some nights with you are so hard to forget Looking at the pictures, I looked so pathetic, addicted, and needy But you looked so incredible And nothing all the sweet tattooed girls could say to me would take my eyes off you After that winter we went our separate ways Memories lasted that sultry gaze And the sound of you using my shower in the morning, baby The words we shared were the stuff of dreams Shining eyes and my heart in flames What did you whisper in my ear? The last bit of my passion, it's all for you Go ahead and take any you want And if it's coming back, 'cause I feel it coming back I hope you'll be right here Take me out for a ride, your eyes deceive me Take me to the other side, oh please don't leave me We'll do it under the night sky, make it forever It'll be just you and I, between our tether Your blood red hair is heavy on my mind I can't break away from all those nights Still think about you, 'cause no-one else will do, no no Never again I'll feel that way Just thinking about where we'll be someday But if I do I'll let you know Your eyes deceive me Oh please don't leave me Make it forever Between our tether After all this time, and all those nights, she wants to know how I feel? Well… I think I love her

about

Listen to this release on your preferred platform:
distrokid.com/hyperfollow/venator/darling

This is the first entry in The Aries Triptych. The next entries will be due throughout the year.

As I run out of "this is a new direction for me" cards, I hope the new vibes and styles I'm approaching will be pleasurable to you. Thank you for your support of the Venator project.

A special thank you to close friends in Clare, Joel, Milan, Dave, Ian, Kate, Elijah, and Leah for helping me creatively center these works. Influences of this EP are among Jai Paul, Trevor Something, Thundercat, Lucy Dacus, Isaac Hayes, and Photay.

Thanks to L for being my forever muse.

Hail to the passion that accelerates us.

credits

released April 29, 2022

Clare Follett - vox/lyrics (Moved On/Already Gone).
Clare Marshall - raconteurism (TWADWYWIME).
Ethan Wanderi - vox/lyrics/co-writing (444).
Icarus The Professional - raconteurism (444).
Joel Stead - additional vox and lyrics (FSETS), backing vox (ATSTG).
The Kount - additional drums (Ode to TG).
Luke Fowler - backing vox (ATSTG), recording assistance (Aisha, TWADWYWIME, FSETS, Moved On, ATSTG).
Mack Stardust - synths, programming, piano, electric guitar, acoustic guitar, bowed guitar, bass, percussion, vox, lyrics, mixing, mastering.
Mattie Konig - backing vox (ATSTG).
Michael Pumphrey - mixing assistance.
Orion’s Shoulder - additional synths (Intro).
Paris DeShawn - vox/lyrics (Deeper).
Ryan Rhodes - keyboard (Ode to TG).
Tyler Lieb - pedal steel (TWADWYWIME).
Wil Schade - saxophone (ATSTG).

________


Art compiled by Mack Stardust.
Photos from TV Heavens Revive Foe Of In, Kyzetta Kelly (Sevyn), Kiera Marie, Ava Muir, Ben Mack, Marie Orlova, M-ART Production, Leah Kelley, Nicolás Langellotti, Gantas Vaičiulėnas, Nichole Sebastian, and Cottonbro.

www.instagram.com/nerv.ii/
www.instagram.com/kieramariecosplay/
www.instagram.com/aavamuir/
www.instagram.com/benmack_/
www.instagram.com/orlovamaria/
www.instagram.com/mart.production/
www.instagram.com/leahkelleyphotography/
www.instagram.com/nicolangellotti/
www.instagram.com/gantasv/
www.instagram.com/bst.psd/
www.instagram.com/cottonbro/

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Venator St. John'S, Newfoundland and Labrador

venator.carrd.co

Molten mounds of cybernetic sounds, bound by ginseng, rainwater, antimatter and cerebral darkness.

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